Summer is finally here and the fireworks went off to prove it. In the past I have dreaded summer in the city, but this year it is treating me well. It can get lonely here during these hot months. Most of the friends and families we see in the park throughout the year leave for the summer months. I don't think there are many other places in the world that this happens, but it is common that people will leave for their vacation homes or destinations for the months of July and August. For those of us with responsibilities or lack of funds (or both) it can feel lonely and empty in the summer. Add to that equation single motherhood and freelance job and it can get stressful and depressing. Perhaps I was more prepared this summer but it isn' yet affecting me. Luckily my job has held steady for the past month, and if it slowed down I think I would like the break to catch up on those stacks of projects mounting on my desk.
So during this hottest of hot summer weekends in the city Isa and I made the most of it. Her father is stepping up a bit more to help out these days and I am trying my best to allow him in her life. It is a true test in patience, zen, and holding back every thought I have. It is an enormous undergoing and practice of tolerance, and yet I know she needs a father and this is the one she has. So I practice patience which is also great use when raising a toddler. There are many times when there is a parallel process in dealing with Isa and dealing with my ex.
But it is helpful to know he is there now to take her into the dreaded swimming pool near our house. This has been my nightmare 2 years going now. A public pool for kids (and their chapperones) in which bathing suits must be worn (without coverups) for all of SOHO (ie: model and fashinista hell) to see and judge. I will make it into the pool before summer ends but for now I am happy to let this be his way of bonding with his daughter.
So after a long day of park and pool I decided to take ISa to the fireworks. She told me she would rather watch Diego at home, which I let her watch hoping it would keep her up to watch the fireworks. It did, but then she wanted more Diego and not to go outside with me. The poor creature- I almost caved, but I knew she would love them. How do you describe fireworks to a child who has never seen them before.
This is how she likes to watch our computer - curled up and nearly falling off....so cute!!
So I took her in her pajamas and grabbed some juice and the Ergo and we set off toward the river. Now I had no idea if we could actually get to the river and if so if we could view the fireworks from there. We arrived at 9:20pm and 5 minutes later they started. Isa's face lit up with a smile and she said, "Wow, Mommy look", which made the entire thing worth it. It is amazing to watch her see things for the first time. If it were not for Isa I most likely would have stayed home, but I love to see her experiencing new things and especially these amazing events that happen infrequently throughout the year. After about 15 minutes she was ready to go, and so we walked back through the dark and slightly haunting streets of the west side, but it felt energetic and uplifting to be out on a hot summer night with the best person I know.
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